5:00 AM 😉
Being 21, makes you look life in a different way. Long gone are the days, when happiness meant getting wild at a birthday party. I still remember, when I wrote the first part of this article, almost a year back, I was a lone wanderer. A real loner. But then, as you realise, keeping hold of your life is not possible, you let it go. Let it take the course that it wishes to take. There is my one facebook buddy. He usually keeps writing stories like status’, notes, and poems, centred at his lost love. His posts usually say how much he misses his love of life. Then, whenever I came across one of his posts, I would sit, and think, how do people figure out this easily what do they miss most in their lives. Isn’t that very difficult?
On one hand, you get happy like you are living the best life in the world, with cute friends, luxuries, for which you even don’t have to work. On the other, even an hour alone at midnight, with nobody around you, shakes you from the deepest within? What is that thing that you love the most and what is the thing that you regret and fear the most? Figuring this out, many people spend their lives and very few, lucky ones, do before situations get irreversible. Taking decisions in behalf of these realisations is then the second most difficult step. Because if you had figured it out wrong, and you go with it, then in short, you end up screwing the rest of your happiness. Done correctly, that thing can assure you happiness and peace for the rest of your life.
Time, come to rescue. You leave the things, just like the way you do every time. This can, at first, seem like a very appropriate thing to do, let the supreme decide what he wants for you. But everybody knows, this never is a good choice. Being escapist is a thing, escaping things to let them go out of your control, is whole another. So, you have to take decisions, to take decisions, you have to figure out the answers. This brings us to where we started. A vicious circle is formed. Breaking of this circle is achieved in usually two ways by most of the people. First, get drunk, sort the things out. Buy getting drunk, I mean giving up. Take the chances. Either it is everything, or nothing. Second, take enough time, weigh up everything, and then proceed, with caution, and backup plans. Either it’s everything or you will get a setback. Now, most of you must be thinking, what the problems are for which one usually get stuck up like this. And in the next two three lines, you may realise that you are stuck up to. So if not in right mood now, quit reading from here. Else, brave heart, here are the things.
Starting from a guy, basic problems forming this loop are these. Too many to list. Examples, one, it maybe a girl, as in case of fb buddy. If you are a normal, 90’s guy, you usually have that one girl, which you don’t want to give up. And then, things occur which force you to. Maybe a high school crush, maybe a hometown girl next door, maybe a college girlfriend. But, then, you are forced to make choices. Leave her, or stay with her. As simple as that. Stay with her, or if she is not with you, as in case of my facebook buddy, stay with her in thoughts, and see everything get out of your hands, in front of your eyes. Leave her, and regret later. See, the vicious problem circle? Second comes, the career. Passions, interests and their risks a side while having money, stability and practicality on the other. Most people end up, in this case, choosing the other, choosing just opposite to what they love and going for the things they fear most. Result, you maybe end up getting insomniac in a very good paying job. Satisfaction, all gone. Nightmares haunt, what it would have been if you took the other path at that time? What if you would have been a successful painter, photographer, writer, dancer, singer, director, social activist, and maybe politician?
Then, in life of a girl. Society believes girls are weak. I believe, girls are usually a little bit more scared. Not their fault, society being full of guys looking for girls, to release their frustration, emotional, physical, they do need to worry. So, they generally opt for the options which will keep them safe. Safe, from being heartbroken, left dependent, left neglected. They opt for careers, which make them independent, pay them well, and secure their future. They opt for relationships, which let them stay independent, have security in them. For this, even if they have to let go of their dreams, things they love most, they do. Crying is always an option. At nights. No offense intended.
So, now, ask yourself a simple question. What is that you wish most in this life? What was your wish that you left unfulfilled just because life forced you to leave it that way? Was it worth leaving? Can you get it back? If yes, at cost of what? And you will feel helpless, at least for a moment. This is not the end of it, because giving it an end here would be unjust, because I am, myself, still in this vicious circle. If I came over it someday, there will be a part three.
MIDNIGHT MEMORIES PART II
5:00 AM 😉