Prem Ratan Dhan Payo: Review

21 Nov

First things first, If you are a Salman Khan Fan, QUIT. QUIT like now. Words ahead may lead you to plan nasty things for me, which I obviously don’t want. You gotta fear Bhai’s fans. Okay So,
Now, if you are a Sonam Fan, oh wait! You are not. No, Right? What? Seriously? Okay. You also quit. Life is available on discount these days. Get one maybe?

There comes a moment in everybody’s life when he makes a tough choice. And a bad choice. But no, going to watch PRDP is not one of that mistakes. It is something altogether different. A different equation of insanity.

So, here we start.

You read the cautionary reviews on Twitter, and some trusted forums. They advise you not to go to PRDP. But since you have got nothing better to do, as in my case, being on holidays, you still decide to make a run for it.

Then you go on to witness the thing.

Salman makes an entrance with the dialogue “Kisi ke hath chalte hain, kisi ke pair chalte hain, humare dono chalte hain”

I looked at the friend (the movie guy) exactly at the same moment and said oh boy. Yes, we are watching a Salman’s flick after all.

So, it only starts here. Sonam Kapoor plays a hot Rajkumari who does philanthropy for a living. Salman wish to see Sonam. Sonam does not know this Salman. She is about to marry another Salman, which being a doppelgänger of that Salman, is actual Prince of some fort. Prince Salman goes crashing from a Chariot, (oh man, going too loud with apple earplugs can be dangerous, even for a prince!), the initial Salman replaces him at the fort to keep the thing going.

Umm..okay. Let’s not get into the script of this thing. Let’s look at all the major parts of the movie one by one.

Salman: Well, he is Salman. You can not take that away. The crowd gets to watch two Salman’s instead of regular one in this movie.

Sonam: Sonam is cute. She is. But she is still way far from what we call good acting standards. Or okay acting standards. She did do some awful things, though. Wearing Sunglasses to Dining Table, delivering dialogues like “Raam jaisa kahenge seeta vaisa hi karegi” all with that passion that sends an altogether different meaning.
Story: It’s pretty fucked up. It would be rather incorrect to say that movie has not got a good story. Thing is, it has got a creepily fucked up story. *Now 2-minute silence for Neil Nitin Mukesh at this time who is also in there*

Dialogues: Remember the Hindi Sitcoms which we used to make fun of when we were in school? Their dialogues? Yes, you got it right. It has got all the things straight from those sitcoms. The curtains, the costumes, the slow paced dialogue delivery, the monologues and what not.
Anupam Kher: Man, you gotta retire now. In fact, you should be somewhere in the Cayman’s sipping a mojito already. Why now? Every time I came out of the shock of a song that kept popping throughout, he was right there, all set to deliver some dialogue which makes you question your life choices again.
The Sheesh Mahal: Suraj Barjatya, the Director, goes a step ahead of humanity, and creates a Sheesh Mahal, or a glass palace, right on the top edge of a waterfall, that looks like Niagra in the middle of what looks like a sea. Yes, you can read the previous sentence again. Go on.

Climax: In the end, both the Salman’s get together at this glass palace, along with Neil and few other men. What follows is a close combat with swords and all. Oh man, I so much missed the guns! I mean these guys rode Mercedes, used iPhones, wore designers throughout the whole thing. Why not the guns? Okay, so, it ends somehow. One Salman saving Neil from falling into the Niagra’s.

By the time we finished watching it, the guy with me didn’t even want his money back. He just wanted to go. Home. 😦


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